


The Christmas Special

by starlight_and_seafire



Series: Holiday Road [3]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Christmas, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Modern AU, POV Rey (Star Wars)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 05:30:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17156126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starlight_and_seafire/pseuds/starlight_and_seafire
Summary: Every year, Poe's family gathers at Kes Dameron’s home for the annual Christmas celebration. Poe's family was large, tightknit, warm, and loving.And it was all very new to Rey.





	The Christmas Special

“Can someone hand me the chicken broth?”

“Hey! Could you two help me bring in the gifts from the car?”

“There should be a few more bottles of wine in the back, I’ll go grab them.”

Rey walked into the large house alongside Poe and was quickly greeted by a cacophony of noise. The house was already teeming with people, shouted greetings and instructions mingling with the festive sounds of Christmas music playing on the stereo.

Poe was quickly swept up into the arms of an older woman. The woman was shorter than Poe, having to reach up to pull him down into a warm hug while peppering kisses on his cheek, but he went willingly, a joyful smile on his face. The resemblance was clear, although the woman’s hair was more grey than dark brown, the bulk of it pulled back into a low bun at the nape of her neck. The eyes were the same deep brown though, the skin crinkling at the corners, clearly reflecting an inner warmth and joy.

Rey didn’t even need to be introduced to know the two were related, but she appreciated the kindness of the woman who quickly made Poe take the casserole dish from Rey in order to wrap Rey’s hands up in her own.

“I’m Lara Dameron, Poe’s aunt,” she said. “And you must be Rey. It’s so good to finally meet you! We’ve heard so much about you.”

Rey’s eyes widened a little even as she returned the warm smile offered to her, as she realized that Poe had been talking about her to his family.

“Don’t worry,” he had said to her on the drive over, after he had done his best to describe who she would be meeting today and what they were like. One of his hands let go of the steering wheel to reach over and squeeze her hand resting in her lap. “They’re all super nice. It’s just a big, warm family. There probably won’t be any rude comments or real arguments or anything like that, not unless you get them talking about sports. At worst, there might be a little TMI. But relax. They’ll love you, I promise.”

Honestly, Rey had been tense for the last week, ever since she had accepted Poe’s invitation to his family’s annual Christmas celebration, where extended family and friends gathered at Poe’s father’s home to celebrate the holiday. Apparently the gathering usually involved two or three dozen people, most of whom had known Poe since he was just a baby being shown off in his mother’s and father’s arms.

It’s not to say that she wasn’t happy at being invited. No, she had been quite pleased at the invitation, even excited, and quickly started peppering Poe with questions so that she might make a good first impression. But despite Poe’s constant reassurances, there was still a small, but constant, sense of anxiety fluttering away in her stomach leading up to the event.

The introductions continued, one after another, while Rey did her best to try to remember the names and faces that passed in front of her. She had never said her name so many times in such a short period of time, had never seen so many pleased faces and warm smiles directed her way when she was introduced. Her initial worries quickly fell away at the warmth of everyone’s greetings, and the easy way she was included in the large gathering.

Soon enough, she had found a comfortable spot in the living room, surrounded by several of Poe’s cousins, a few of them sitting on the couch while a few more were on the floor, helping the youngest ones assemble some large creation made of Legos. She quickly became wrapped up in the project, letting the conversation wash over her while helping the youngest one, who had climbed into her lap, put several of the pieces together. There was little pressure in working with the young children and helping them put the Legos together, and it was easy enough to join in on the conversation going on around her.

She never expected to feel this comfortable so quickly. 

It was only later that the darker thoughts would intrude, that she would think to herself that she should’ve known better than to think the feeling would last.

When Kes Dameron called out that dinner was ready, the crowd eagerly made their way into the kitchen, lining up before one of the largest selections of food she had ever seen. People were packing into the kitchen, filling their plates before making their way to one of the three large tables situated in the room off of the kitchen.

Poe pulled her into the line, passing her an empty plate at the same time he pressed a kiss to her cheek. A blush rose to her face then, both from the sweetness of the kiss, and the simultaneous _awws_ from several of the others in line around them, leading her to the realization that she had become the center of attention, at least for the moment.

She watched as Poe heaped what seemed to be a mountain of food onto his plate, and though she eyed the variety with the same hunger, she couldn’t shake the little voice in her head whispering that she was a guest, and she should be much more cautious and not take too much.

“Not hungry?” Poe asked, eyeing her plate and then her with concern as she sat down next to him.

She smiled at him, even as she shrugged her shoulders.

“Well, if you’re still hungry, feel free to go up for seconds or thirds. They always make enough to feed an army here.”

Once one of Poe’s uncles said grace, everyone started digging into their food. Now that everyone was crowded in close, Rey got a close up view of just how tightknit a family this was. Conversation flowed quickly, turning from how the children were doing in school, to the work woes of several of the adults, and then to contemplating family vacation plans.

Then someone asked about Rey. All of a sudden, it was as if everyone’s focus simultaneously turned to the newcomer in the group, and Rey found herself the center of attention, everyone’s questions and comments directed straight to her.

It wasn’t as if they were intrusive or unkind. No, like Poe, it seemed almost everyone in the family was warm and kind.

But it was suddenly very clear to Rey that she was the outsider. The newcomer. The one who didn’t quite fit in, didn’t know how to fit in, not when her experience with family came from an uninterested guardian growing up, and her experience with holidays involved more than a few lonely Christmas dinners by herself, at least until she had met Finn.

She managed to keep the smile on her face as she continued to answer questions, even as she grew more and more tense, feeling as if her nerves were slowly becoming more and more exposed from all the attention, until she was able to make her escape when Kes Dameron announced dessert.

While everyone got up to make their plates and scatter to more comfortable seating arrangements in the living room, someone once more turning up the music, she finds her way to the guest bedroom. She gently shuts the door behind her, hopeful that no one had seen her sneak away, and sits down on the edge of the bed, hunching over as she takes deep breaths in.

Her eyes are closed as she tries to hold back tears and calm down, but she can see the amount of light increase from behind her eyelids, hears the music grow louder, as someone opens the door, the light and sound decreasing once more as the door closes again.

For a moment, she thinks she’s still alone, but then there’s the soft shushing sounds of footsteps on the carpet, a murmured “Sweetheart” as Poe approaches.

She slowly opens her eyes to see Poe kneeling in front of her, a tentative hand outstretched towards her. She knows he’s waiting for permission to touch her while she’s clearly upset about something, and when she nods, he rests his hand on her knee.

“What’s going on? You want to talk about it?”

His voice is soft when he asks, and his eyes are so kind, and in the dark of the room, it all spills out of her. She’s not used to so many people, not used to the sort of warmth and love that practically fills the air in the house this evening. There’s a part of her that can’t even really understand it, how something like this was even possible, not when all she’s ever known are a small handful of close friends she considers family.

“It’s overwhelming,” she says, and though she doesn’t tell him how it feels like there’s something rubbed raw inside her, something exposed and sensitive, he seems to understand, and he takes her hand, his thumb rubbing soothingly over her knuckles.

“We can go home, if you want. I can make up some excuse about feeling unwell. I certainly ate enough that no one would question it, and I can get us out of here pretty quickly.”

She shakes her head quickly, swallowing around the lump that seems to have formed in her throat at his concern. “No, no. I’ll be fine, I just need a minute.”

“We can take as much time as you need. Or if you want to be alone, I can leave.”

She shakes her head again, and he stays, still kneeling in front of her. She works on taking deep breaths, feeling herself start to calm down.

She’s just about ready to leave the room and join the party once more, but there is still something she wants to say. She knows Poe well enough that she knows better than to apologize for all this, for her need to be alone for a few minutes away from the buzz of his large family, and she struggles to find the right words.

“I hope you know that I appreciate you inviting me to be with your family for Christmas. That I’ve really enjoyed being here and getting to know everyone. It’s just – I guess for the first time I really saw what it could’ve been like to have a home, a family to come back to, and I just got a little overwhelmed, and needed to retreat for a bit.”

Poe smiles at her, a soft look, even as he leans down to press a kiss against her knuckles. “I know even in the best of circumstances they could be overwhelming for anyone. And I’m so glad that you came with me this year. I just wish I could’ve done something to make it easier for you-”

“You did everything right, Poe. Don’t think for a second I think differently, or that I regret coming here at all. You – all of you – have made me feel so at home today. It’s been one of the best Christmases I’ve ever had, and it means so much to me.” She gazes at him for a moment, a soft smile on her face as she squeezes his hand. After one more deep breath, she stands and helps him up from where he’s been kneeling on the floor.

She walks over to the mirror in the corner of the room, smoothing her hair back down from where she had upset it when she had run her fingers through it, and checks to make sure there’s no other evidence that she had been upset. She turns to Poe with a smile on her face and asks, “Why don’t we get back to the party?”

“In a minute,” he says, walking over to her with his hand outstretched. “But first, may I have this dance?”

In her surprise, she can’t help but giggle as Poe bows in front of her, and offering him her hand, he pulls her into a close embrace. The music is soft from where it filters in through the closed door, and they shuffle around the room, enjoying the feeling of being close to each other while the party continues on outside.

In a moment, they’ll leave the little room and join the others once again. But for now, she sighs contently, closing her eyes and resting her head on his shoulder, as they continue their dance.

_Friends and relations send salutations_   
_Sure as the stars shine above_   
_This is Christmas, yeah, Christmas my dear_   
_The time of year to be with the one you love_

_So won't you tell me you'll never more roam_   
_Christmas and New Years will find you home_   
_Please come home for Christmas_   
_Please come home for Christmas_   
_If not for Christmas by New Year's night_


End file.
